27!!!!!

hey guys!!!  faithful blog-readers of mine!
i turned 27 on saturday, holy cow!  all the exclamation points!!!  i started blogging when i was 17, so how bout that, huh?

it's been a little while, but i thought i'd share with you guys what's been going on with me.  because i often have lots of thoughts bouncin around in my head, and this trusty rusty blog has always been such a great place to put those things to rest.
i'll share the only way i know how, with lil tidbits.  man, i'm craving sitting across from each of you with a coffee!  that would be so fun!  we'll have to save it for when all of this is over.

first, on being 27.  to tell you the truth, ever since i was turning 18, i have not wanted to be the next age.  i just really liked being 17 i guess and each year since then, i've felt a tiny grieving over the new age in the weeks before.  i always cozy up to the new number eventually, but for year 27, i don't know, something about it i really really like.  young, but not that young.  old enough to still be in my twenties but at the same time have some true stability behind my identity and some sturdiness to what i have to say, if that makes sense.  (just speaking from my own experience and definitely not saying that you can't have that when you're younger or that i didn't).  i guess it's all been building up to now for me.

my birthday was special and different.  francis cooked a lovely breakfast and we had my family over in the morning. **i'm a little hesitant to say that here because lots of folks are not seeing anybody.  for my family and i, we made the decision that seeing just each other is okay with us because we are all remaining at home the rest of the time and not really going out.  i totally have respect for the seriousness of the pandemic and for all the safety measures that we all need to take.**  my fam came over and gifted me with lovely cards and thoughtful presents, and francis put candles in cinnamon rolls for me to blow out. :)  we took a walk around our neighborhood with paige & dave, and then francis and i walked to minneapolis!  there is a wonderful walk/bike path right next to our apartment that you can take straight to minneapolis, about 6 miles.  francis had booked us a hotel in minneapolis that was still open for when we got there because i LOVE hotels! (we brought backpacks with our stuff).  in the words of kevin malone, our dogs were barkin by the time we got there, ha (i definitely wore the wrong shoes).  we got take-out from my favorite restaurant which was conveniently a short walk from the hotel :), and ate it while watching the parent trap on TV (isn't that fun about hotels, just watching stuff on TV?).  it was such a fun birthday, even if i couldn't have a gathering with friends.  francis and my family made it so special and many dear friends of mine also made me feel loved.  plus!  the next morning when we walked back home, starting in the quietness of the city, we stopped at caribou for my free birthday drink and my dear friend ariel (shout out!) had also gifted me with a little coffee drink money, so francis got somethin too.  it was all really fun and i'm so grateful.

other thoughts...

well, i found out that my job will continue to be remote until august, so that's somethin.  in august we were planning to move to a new building anyway, so they are just having us continue to work from home until then, and some of us might even work from home after that.  i actually really enjoy working from home and it works well with me.  but i know some of my coworkers who also have kiddos at home are struggling with balancing everything, which would be super tough.

a quarantine birthday, while a bummer, is also a gift because it's easy to feel isolated right now, and having that boost of love and encouragement really felt good.  i don't know, man, some days i'm doing really well and other days i can't fall asleep because i'm so sad and i convince myself that i don't have friends.  anybody else experience that?  one of the happy things that has come out of this pandemic is i've seen a lot of people express grace over social media.  people will say things like "however you're feeling is okay" and "you don't have to be super productive every day, just do what you can" and "you can't hold yourself to the same standards as the way things used to be."  it's just nice.

one of the things my mom got be for my birthday is the most lovely lilac body wash from bath & body works, and i know it's a little thing, but it smells so good.

francis and i have now been married for a year!  wowza!  it feels really good to have a year under our belts.  and what a sweet sweet, growing, year it has been.  lots i could say, but i'll maybe save it because this post is getting long.  spent too much time talkin about my dang birthday, ha.

speaking of marriage, something i've noticed in my heart and something a friend i talked to is also experiencing, is this idea of a "life timeline."  anyone know what i mean?  it feels like pressure from ourselves and the culture around us to get married at a certain age, buy a house at a certain age, have a kid by a certain time, etc.  i have a feeling my friend and i are not alone in this.  most of the time, none of our lives ever end up the way we thought they would and hardly ever within the timeline we imagined, so why is it so hard to let go of the timelines and stop comparing our lives with each other?  i think this is good stuff to think about because it causes us to look at the root of what we really, truly, want out of our lives.  gosh, i have lots more to say.

and i will continue this thought in the next post!  didn't think there was so much to say, but i'll have to come back with the rest.  hope you and yours are doing well!  love you guys!  it means a lot to me to have you here.

p.s. if you're looking for something to lift your spirits, watch some good news HERE :)