it's something little that mom shared with me from a message at church that she hasn't been able to get out of her head for a couple weeks. the guy speaking gave the example of how in Bible study when it's time for prayer at the end, we all ask for prayer about a change in jobs, wisdom on the next step to take because work isn't bringing joy, prayer that work gets better, etc etc.. and this guy said something rather provocative and refreshing (to me).. he said, "what if God doesn't want you to like your job?" ha! he was being kind of sassy, but his point was, he said, "i deserve death and i'm asking that my job would be just a little more comfortable?!" basically, our priorities, our gratitude need some looking at. i don't think this way often enough. i always think i deserve the very best, the most comfortable, the easiest, the thing that makes me most happy and rarely am shaken by the fact that i actually deserve death. this was especially stunning to hear from my mom, who actually truly hates her job and cries sometimes at work because people are so mean to her and it is so hard. her point in sharing it, my point in sharing it, is if i thought more about how i deserve death i wouldn't feel as entitled to everything i feel so entitled to daily. i know this sounds harsh and rather shocking and is suuper not popular to make such statements, but i actually believe that apart from the take-my-breath-away beautiful beautiful grace and mercy of Jesus Christ, we all deserve death. (all the hiding my face emojis!!! eeep! not a popular thing to say!)
of course i could make a post to balance all of this with a little more grace and all about how much God loves us and wants the best for us, but sometimes i think we need this message, this reminder, a little more frequently. i certainly do. the words of the great isaac redinger ring in my ears.. "may we never believe we deserve this." (any of it!) truly. oh, the enormous gratitude!
please don't hate me. haha. (kinda serious).
just wanted to share.